Posts tagged with “silly”

Quick Takes

Just thought I’d throw this out before I head off to dinner. Just a short list today.

• Just like my disdain for the term “webmaster,” I’m also opposed to “power user.” In my experience, power users are people that try to do things for themselves or think they know “a lot” about using computers. Fascinatingly enough, they also seem to come to me to fix their computer more than the average Joe. Why? Because the average Joe is scared out of his mind that he’s going to frig something up. Power user Bob isn’t afraid to attempt an upgrade of his BIOS during a thunderstorm.

  Also, it seems like the only individuals that actually use the term power user are the ones that need emotional reinforcement: they were probably something special back in the days of Windows 3.1. Boy oh boy, they could navigate those DOS prompts like no other. But today, when their biggest tricks involve making your computer faster by doing a “defrag” or “clearing the prefetch,” they’re all washed up.

  If that’s truly the case, then I guess I do feel a little sorry for these guys, though. They’re clinging to their power term like a right-wing nutcase clinging to the sanctity of marriage.

• I cried my eyes out during the House’s season four finale. I’ve never cried that much over a TV show in my life.

• Every week, I get an email from Mint telling me how much money I have left in my bank accounts. I never look forward to it.

  Anyhow, every time I look at it, I cry a little bit and think, “Where is all of my money going!?” And then I realize that I’m paying for my own health insurance and feel only slightly better. Obama Care cannot come fast enough.

That’s all, folks.

How ridiculous…

Has anybody ever actually pondered how ridiculous the nursery rhyme Humpty Dumpty is? Let’s analyze this in pieces:

• The story is about a man sitting on a wall.
• The man is an egg. Like a chicken egg. He came out of the bottom of a chicken.
• He falls off the wall.
• The egg man’s name is Humpty Dumpty.
• A “King” clearly has some invested interest in Humpty. Otherwise, he couldn’t give two farts about whether some dumbass fell off the wall and just so happened to smash into a jillion pieces.
• The man is an egg.
• The king’s men cannot reassemble Humpty. Nor can the king’s horses.
• The king orders his horses to help put Humpty back together.
• The man is a god damned egg

Because Humpty isn’t reassembled, he is presumably left in pieces. This is nursery-rhyme code for “THEY LEFT HUMPTY FOR DEAD”

Did I mention that the main character is an egg man? I think I did.

So there are some alternate theories. Some say that it refers to King Richard III of England, who was hacked to pieces after he was deserted by his supporters. Which is absolutely wonderful to be making a nursery rhyme about, though it could be worse.

So that’s all I have to say about that.

I never thought I’d see the day

Many of you remember my BFF Carrie from a while ago. Well, I never thought I’d see the day, but she now has a Twitter. And we have a black president. Who would have ever seen this coming? Get it? See it coming? COMING? LOL.

Pop Tart Monday

Now if you’ve known me for more than about a day, you’d know that I eat ridiculously healthy. All the time. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Every day. For weeks on end. I can’t even remember the last time I had soda, but I can remember that when I did, the sugar overtook me and I almost puked.

There’s one exception, though, and I make it very rarely. So rarely, in fact, that it’s unbelievable that it’s even a noticeable trend. I sometimes suck it up and go for the traditional POP TART MONDAYS.

So what is Pop Tart Monday? Well, when it’s Monday and you have Pop Tarts, you have some Pop Tarts. That’s it. Eat Pop Tarts on a Monday. Simple as that.

For whatever reason, this is my biggest guilty pleasure of ALL TIME. It’s absolutely wonderful.